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This story continues where “I Ain’t Gettin’ Any Younger” left off Saturday, January 22 Late Evening Spring is here (ooo-ooo-ooo) It wasn’t spring, the
sky outside wasn’t blue, and Honey was pretty sure that there weren’t any
birds outside singing. But, miracle of all miracles, she would be saying “I
do” today! (Well, technically it would more likely be the following day
rather than the present day, but still…) In
less than twenty-four hours, she would be Mrs. Brian Belden, and that was
worth singing about. How she had longed for this day! Honey
had been dreaming of becoming a bride ever since she was a little girl. Her
obsession with weddings had started at a young age. When she was seven, she’d
accompanied her parents to a society wedding. Honey had taken in everything
with wide eyes. The bride had been as glamorous as a princess; everyone in
the church had been awestruck at her presence. It was just as if Honey were
watching a real fairy tale unfold before her very own eyes. When the handsome
groom kissed his bride and the minister pronounced them husband and wife,
Honey had wanted to stand up and cheer. Ever
since that day, she’d longed to be a fairy tale bride. When she was away at
boarding school, she had spent her long, lonely evenings planning her own
wedding. She’d kept all her ideas in a scrapbook, all the while dreaming of a
day when she would find the love of her life. She hated being alone. Once she
fell in love and got married, she’d never be lonely again. She had reminded
herself frequently of that as she worked on her album. Over time she’d added
and removed pictures until everything was perfectly perfect. After
years and years of nailing down the minutest of details, Honey found it
ironic that nothing was going according to plan. On the eve of her wedding,
she wasn’t having a slumber party in the Plaza with her closest friends in
attendance. She was sitting in the Delta terminal of LaGuardia Airport,
waiting for a plane. Instead of the formal wedding she’d wanted at Trinity
Church, she and Brian would be exchanging vows at a wedding chapel in Las
Vegas. There hadn’t been time for a trip to Kleinfeld Bridal to find a dress,
and there certainly wasn’t time for a designer to create a one-of-a-kind gown
perfectly suited for her. I’ll have time to find a dress tomorrow, she
reminded herself. The important thing
is that Brian and I are finally getting married! All my dreams are finally
coming true. When she had first
met him over twelve years ago, Honey had decided Brian would be a perfect
husband. Not only was he handsome, he possessed all the necessary characteristics
that any good spouse should have. In a lot of ways, he reminded Honey of her own
father. They had casually
dated throughout high school, but Brian hadn’t made things official until the
night of her graduation. She’d hoped they would marry as soon as she finished
college, but Brian had thrown her for a loop by devising a long list of
things he needed to accomplish before they tied the knot. There had been
times when she thought they would never get engaged, much less get married, yet
here she was in the airport, a diamond ring on her left hand, and a plane
ticket to Las Vegas in her purse. What
a difference a day could make. This afternoon she was lamenting the fact that
she likely would never get engaged, and this evening she was waiting to catch
a plan that would whisk her away to her wedding. With a wistful smile, she
studied the twinkling gemstone that graced her left ring finger. How long
she’d waited to see a diamond there! “Are
you okay?” Startled
out of her reverie, Honey looked up into the face her fiancé, who had just
returned from a trip to the restroom. “Pardon?” “Are
you okay?” Brian repeated, claiming the seat beside her. “You look like
you’re going to pass out.” Embarrassed
to be caught daydreaming, Honey laughed. “Sorry. My mind was a million miles
away. I didn’t mean to scare you.” “You
look kind of pale.” “Brian,
it’s the middle of January,” she pointed out. “Everyone but you is pale.” Undeterred,
Brian continued to study her closely. “When was the last time you ate?” “This
afternoon, at Ruthie’s shower.” She flashed him a saucy smile. “I was under
the impression that we’d be going out to eat later, not running off to
Vegas.” “Hey,
when I asked you to help me get settled, I said that I’d make it worth your while,” Brian said with a wink. “Well,
nobody can accuse you of reneging on a deal,” Honey chuckled. “But
they can accuse me of starving you
to death. Let’s go get something to eat at Nathan’s…” Honey
held up a hand in protest. “I’m fine, Brian. We’ll get something as soon as
we land.” “That
could be a while.” “It’s
just as well,” she told him. “I’m too excited to eat.” “All
right, but make sure you don’t faint from hunger,” Brian warned. “I don’t
have to be at the office for another eight days, and I intend to enjoy my
wedding and my honeymoon without resuscitating anyone.” “You
know, there once was a time when you would’ve been more than willing to
perform CPR on me,” she teased. “Yeah,
twelve years ago, when I was sixteen,” he returned. “Our relationship has
advanced since then, so I don’t have to rely on such desperate juvenile
measures to kiss you. Now I can play tonsil hockey with you anytime I want.” Honey
made a clucking sound with her tongue as she shook her head. “There you go
again, with that cocksure attitude,” she chided playfully. “I’ll
let you in on a little secret.” Wrapping an arm around her shoulder, Brian
leaned towards her in a conspiratorial manner, and whispered huskily into her
ear. “There’s a one-hundred percent chance I’ll be kissing you tomorrow tonight.
It’s in the rulebook; the preacher’s going to make you do it, whether you
like it or not.” Honey
melted into his embrace, settling her cheek comfortably against his chest.
This familiar position never failed to reassure her. “Oh, all right,” she
huffed, feigning disgust. “If it’s going to take a little tongue to make this
thing legal, I guess I’ll plant a
big one on you. Just don’t give me your cooties.” “I
planned on giving you something a lot more substantial than cooties,” he
murmured. His warm breath tickled her ear and caused her to giggle. “Promises,
promises,” she chanted as she nestled closer to him. She never failed to feel safe and secure when
she was with Brian. There was something familiar about him, something
steadfast. After her tumultuous childhood, it was reassuring to know that
Brian would never let her down. He had such a trustworthy air about him, and
she need never fear that he would desert her. With a sigh of contentment, she
relaxed into his arms. These were the same arms that she’d helped shrug into
his red Bob-White jacket for the first time, the same arms that had held her
while they danced in Arizona, the same arms that had sheltered her from the
storm on Cobbett’s Island. She could hear the wind blowing outside, but here
in Brian’s arms, she found reassurance that she wasn’t alone. Her thoughts of the
nasty weather must’ve caused her to shiver. “Are you cold?” Brian
asked. “A little,” she
admitted. “What’s it like outside?” “I heard someone saying
that the rain was supposed to turn to ice later, but hopefully our flight
will take off before it does.” Honey gasped. “Oh,
no! Do you think they’ll cancel our flight?” “I don’t know for
sure, but I certainly hope not,” he answered. “We might have to drive all the
way to Vegas.” “There goes those
eight days you have off,” she giggled. The pocket of Brian’s
jacket suddenly started buzzing. He reached inside, pulled out his cell
phone, and looked at the display. “It’s Moms.” “Don’t answer it!”
Honey shrieked. “Why not?” “She’ll know that
we’re getting ready to elope!” Brian chuckled. “Not
unless we tell her.” “Don’t kid yourself,”
Honey said with a sigh of impatience. “Your mother knows everything, and if
she finds out that we’re running off to get married, she’ll call my mother.” “Would that be so
bad?” “Yes!” she hissed.
“If Mother finds out that we’re on our way to Vegas, she’ll send the National
Guard out to stop our flight.” Brian shrugged his
shoulders. “So what if your mom does
find out? It’s our wedding.” “That has nothing to
do with it,” Honey snorted. “When Mother finds out we’ve eloped, I’m going to
be dead meat. She’s going to kill me!” “So, does that mean
that, as your grieving widower, I’m going to inherit a bunch of money after
you die?” Honey used her elbow
to jab Brian in the ribs. “Well, well, well,” she muttered with exaggerated
disgust. “The truth finally comes out. All this time you’ve just been after
my vast fortune.” “Oh, no! You’re on to
me!” Brian clutched his heart in melodramatic fashion. “Twelve years’ worth
of plotting and planning… down the drain!” “Yeah, you’re going
to have to find a new heiress to woo for the next decade,” Honey teased.
“Seriously, though, Mother is going
to be angry when she finds out. You should see the look she gets on her face
when Jim teases her about eloping with Trixie.” “That bad, huh?” “Oh, yeah,” she
drawled out ominously. “She can throw us a
huge party when we get back,” he suggested. “Somehow I don’t
think a big ‘after party’ will satisfy Mother.” Brian looked her
squarely in the eye. “Remember, pleasing your parents shouldn’t be your main
concern. The important thing is that you’re pleasing yourself. And this does
make you happy, doesn’t it, Hon?” “Of course it does!”
Honey smiled as she laced her fingers through his. “I admit that isn’t how I
envisioned my wedding, but the important thing is that we’ll finally be
married.” “Finally?” Brian
repeated with an arch of one eyebrow. “Yes, finally!” she
reiterated sternly. “I never
thought you’d propose. I was afraid that I’d be alone forever, especially
with Trixie and Jim getting married in a few months.” “Is that why you’ve
been dropping all the hints lately?” Brian asked. He paused to brush away a
lock of tawny-colored hair away from Honey’s forehead. “Have you been worried about being alone?” That question caused
Honey’s breath to catch in her throat. It wasn’t a particularly deep statement,
but it was an epiphany. It was like a light bulb had suddenly come on,
illuminating a room that had once been dark and unexplored. Now that she
could see all the cobwebs, she almost wished the light had never been turned
on in the first place. “Honey? Are you
okay?” Brian’s voice brought
her crashing back to reality. The resulting thud made it difficult to speak.
“Excuse me?” she choked out. “I asked if you were
okay.” Brian regarded her with the same probing gaze with which he used on
his patients. “I’m fine,” she said,
mustering a convincing smile. “I just zoned out there for a second.” “Are you sure your
blood sugar isn’t low?” “Brian, quit being
such a worrywart; I’m ditzy, not hypoglycemic,” she assured him. “I’ll quit worrying
if you stop scaring me like that.” Honey was able to
manage a laugh that didn’t sound completely phony. “Sorry. I guess I have a
lot on my mind, what with trying to plan a wedding overnight.” Satisfied with her
answer, Brian returned her smile. “I suppose that would give you a lot to think about.” “Weddings require a
lot of detail. Haven’t you ever watched Rich
Bride, Poor Bride?” Brian shot her a wry
smirk. “Can’t say that I have.” “Somehow that doesn’t
surprise me,” Honey giggled. “And I suppose you
watch it on a regular basis?” “Every Sunday night
at ten,” she chirped. “Aren’t you excited to watch it with me tomorrow?” His liquid brown eyes
moved over her like a gentle caress. “I have a feeling that tomorrow night
we’ll be much too busy to even turn on the television,” he murmured huskily. “Why, Dr. Belden,”
Honey fluttered, “you’re going to make me blush.” “I thought brides
were supposed to blush,” Brian remarked. “Well, I guess they
are.” She glanced down at her watch. “What time is our flight?” “8:06.” After having sat for
an hour, Honey needed to wiggle around to find a more comfortable position.
“Next time we run off to get married, we’ll have to book a flight ahead of
time. Or at least call ahead and make sure that we don’t have to wait two
hours.” “You’re beginning to
sound as impatient as Trixie,” Brian said with a chuckle. “Humph. Trixie would
be bouncing off the walls by now.” “Yes, she would.” “I wonder if I should
give her a call and let her know what’s going on.” One of Brian’s dark
eyebrows winged its way upward. “You realize don’t you that after you call
Trixie, she’s going to inform the rest of Sleepyside? You might as well have
Mart put it in the Sun.” “You’re right, of course,” Honey said, “but
I’m going to have to call her sometime. I think she’ll notice when I don’t come
home tonight. I don’t want her to worry.” “Then call her after
we’re in the air,” Brian suggested. “That way, she can’t talk Jim into coming
with us.” “Ooh! If she and Jim
came, they could be our witnesses!” Honey enthused. Brian’s response was
merely to cross his arms in front of his chest as he studied her with a
whip-sharp gaze. The intense scrutiny
caused her to crack. “Okay, okay! I know what you’re thinking, and you’re
right. I won’t call Trixie until we land in Las Vegas.” “And when you do, don’t
get off that phone until you’ve sworn her to silence,” he directed. “That could make for
a very long call,” Honey teased. “Just make sure that
Trixie promises not to spill the beans.” Brian rolled his eyes in
exasperation. “And you were afraid of telling Moms!” Honey chuckled. “Well,
contrary to popular belief, Trixie can
keep a secret. I’ll just make sure that she doesn’t tell Bobby. He’s the
seecrud-teller in your family.” “Maybe we’ll put him
in charge of spreading the good news once we get back.” “Sounds good to me,”
Honey mumbled. “Hopefully I can dodge a bullet; Mother might shoot the
messenger and leave me alone.” “Do you really think
she’ll react that badly?” Brian asked. Sensing her fiancé’s
worry, Honey squeezed his arm. “She will at first, but after it sinks in, I’m
sure she’ll be fine, especially if we have a formal reception after we get
home. That way, she can still go with me to Kleinfeld’s and help me pick out
a Pnina Tornai. I think she’d enjoy that.” “I don’t have the
faintest idea what a Pnina whatchamacallit is, but yes, I think that would
mean a lot to your mom,” Brian agreed. “I’m sure I can
placate her by letting her help with the arrangements,” Honey continued. “Of
course, most of it is already planned, but there’s still a lot left to do.” Brian drew back in
surprise. “You’ve already got the reception planned?” “Well, it’s been a
little project of mine for a while now,” Honey admitted. Noting Brian’s
shock, she elaborated. “I’ve been planning my wedding since I was a little girl.
I have a scrapbook that contains all my ideas, and it’ll really help me
finalize everything.” “So…” Brian drawled
out, “what kind of wedding did you have planned until I spoiled everything
with my impromptu proposal?” “A really, really, really big one.” “Even bigger than
Trixie and Jim’s?” “Much.” “Then I’m glad I
suggested Vegas,” Brian reflected dryly. “I’d rather just get it over with.” “Get it over with?” Honey echoed. She
hated the shrill tone her voice had taken. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Patches of red
climbed upward from the base of Brian’s throat to his cheeks. “Er, I didn’t
mean that the way it sounded.” “Then what did you mean?” “I meant to say that
I’d rather get the ceremony over
with,” he explained. “Honest, Honey—” “I believe you,” she
interjected. Although the slight hint of a doubt niggled at the back of her
mind, she forced her lips into a tenuous smile. “Like I told myself earlier,
the marriage is more important than the wedding.” Brian reached over
and grabbed her hand. “I agree, but if you really want the wedding of the
century, we can go home and start making arrangements.” “All I want is to be
married to you,” Honey told him. Eyes twinkling mischievously, she added, “Of
course, that’s in addition to having the biggest reception in history.” “I can hardly wait,”
Brian replied as genuinely as humanly possible. Honey flashed him her
sweetest smile. “Good, because as the groom, your attendance is mandatory.” “I’ll be there with
bells on.” “As long as those
bells are attached to an Armani tuxedo, we’re good.” Grinning, Brian
settled his long frame back in the seat into a more comfortable position.
“Now that we’ve got my wardrobe settled, let’s talk about the wedding. Do you
have any ideas?” “Something simple and
classy,” Honey answered. “I definitely don’t want to be married at one of
those tacky wedding chapels. I assume we can find a place that offers that an
elegant, traditional ceremony.” “Understated
elegance, huh? I guess that means Elvis won’t be officiating.” Honey giggled, noting
his crestfallen expression. “I forgot you were vice-president of the New York
chapter of his fan club.” “Well, since the King
can’t perform our nuptials, maybe we can catch one of his shows while we’re
there,” he remarked. “You want to watch an
impersonator?” Honey queried. “On our honeymoon?” “You don’t know that it’s an impersonator! It
could really be Elvis up on that stage!” “Um, yeah. Of course
it could,” she acknowledged with feigned politeness. “Humph, you show no
respect,” Brian huffed. Honey laughed as she
nestled against him. “Even if Elvis did
marry us, the important thing is that by this time tomorrow, I’ll be Mrs.
Brian Belden.” “Does this mean
you’re willing to reconsider letting him marry us after all?” he inquired
archly. She jabbed his gut
with her elbow. “I was speaking figuratively, so don’t get your hopes up.” Brian snapped his
fingers in disappointment. “If I can give up the
wedding of the century, you can give up having the King of Rock and Roll
pronounce us man and wife,” she pointed out. “You drive a hard
bargain, lady,” he muttered with a shake of his head. “I am my father’s daughter,” she said. “I
may look like my mother, but I’ve got the tenacity of the Wheelers.” “Extraordinary good
looks mixed with unusual determination,” Brian snorted. “Now there’s a lethal combination.” Honey’s lips hinted
at a smile. “Well, maybe you can catch one of Elvis’ shows while I go
shopping for a dress tomorrow.” “Surely you have at
least one dress in that huge suitcase you brought!” “A wedding dress, silly,” Honey
clarified. Brian’s brows met in
the bridge above his nose. “But I thought you wanted a Pnina
whatchamacallit.” “I do, but Pnina
Tornai designs exclusively for Kleinfeld’s, so I won’t be able to find any of
her dresses in Vegas,” Honey explained. “So, you’re going to
get two dresses?” “Well, I might be
willing to give up my big church wedding, but I’m not about to compromise on
Pnina,” she retorted. “I’m sure I can find something suitable for the
ceremony, but I’m still getting my dream gown for the reception. I already
know the exact one I want.” Brian’s jaw went
slack. “You already have your dress picked out?” “Oh, yes! The minute
I saw it, I knew it was perfectly perfect. It was almost exactly like the one
I put in my scrapbook when I was younger, only Pnina’s is grander and more
modern.” “It sounds like you
have a lot of stuff in that scrapbook of yours,” Brian remarked. Honey colored
prettily. “Mmm, you could say that.” “Do you happen to have
a groom in there?” “Yeeees,” she drawled
out. “Does he look like
me?” Honey giggled. “He
might… if he had a head.” “Your groom doesn’t
have a head?” Brian asked flatly. “Well, the tuxedo my
future groom would wear at the wedding was more important than the groom
himself, so I just cut off his head and glued his body to the page,” she
explained in typical Honey-speak. “You cut his head off?” Doing her best to
stifle another giggle, Honey nodded. “At the time, planning the perfect
wedding was more important than finding the perfect groom.” Brian shook his head
in disbelief. “Why doesn’t that reassure me?” “I was only ten when
I started my scrapbook,” Honey explained. “I didn’t even know you yet. And
since I went to an all-girls school, my choices were limited.” “Uh-huh.” Although he
was doing his best to assume a wounded expression, Brian clearly wouldn’t win
any Oscars for his performance. It was obvious that he was teasing. “If it makes you feel
better, eventually Trixie, Di, and I did
add your head to the groom’s body.” “Let me get this
straight,” Brian said. “You removed my head from a preexisting picture of me
and glued it to the shoulders of the headless groom in your scrapbook?” “That’s right.” “I don’t know if that
makes me feel better or not,” he retorted. “Poor baby,” Honey
crooned, patting his cheek. Brian’s bottom lip
distended into a pout. “It makes me wonder if marrying me is only necessary
so you can have your wedding.” “Silly goose,” Honey
murmured. “The reason I was so obsessed with weddings when I was younger
wasn’t because I wanted to be a bride; I was obsessed with having the perfect
family. I was a lonely, little girl, stuck in a boarding school far from
home. I thought my mother and father didn’t care about me, and I was too
painfully shy to make friends. Although I was collecting pictures for an
album, I was really dreaming about a future when I wouldn’t be so alone.” “Sweet Honey,” Brian
murmured as he kissed the top of her head. “Once you marry me, you’ll never
be lonely again.” Hearing those words
caused Honey’s stomach to do flip-flops. It was something she had thought,
but had never wanted to admit to herself, much less out loud. “And look at the
bright side,” Brian continued. “Since we’re running off to elope, you won’t
be left by yourself after Trixie gets married. I’m sure that’s been a concern
to you. Now, you won’t ever have to worry again about being alone.” The lump had returned
to Honey’s throat, and she couldn’t say a word. She couldn’t even nod her
head. It was as if her entire body had become frozen. The only part of her
body that wasn’t seemingly dead was her heart; it kept a steady, staccato
rhythm as she mulled over his words. Now,
you won’t ever have to worry again about being alone. Is that why she
wanted to get married so badly? Was she that
afraid of being alone? Suddenly aware that
Brian was speaking, she pushed aside the nagging doubts that were plaguing
her and tried to focus on what he was saying. “…plan on using your
maiden name after we marry?” “What was that?” she
squeaked out through a constricted throat. “After we get
married, what’re you going to do about your last name?” Honey blinked hard,
scrambling for something to say. “I hadn’t thought much about it, but I’ll take
your name, of course.” “So you’ll change the
name of the agency to Belden and Belden? Or will you wait until Trixie gets
married and change it to Frayne and Belden?” “You’re going too
fast for me,” Honey said with a shake of her head. “What? I was able to
confuse the master of Honey-speak?” Brian’s chest swelled with pride. Relaxing slightly,
Honey laughed. “Trixie and I decided a long time ago to always use the
Belden-Wheeler name, even if we did marry. Of course, if Jim had taken
Daddy’s last name, we would still be Belden and Wheeler, and it wouldn’t be
an issue. Why do you ask?” “We’ve never really
discussed such things,” Brian explained. “I-I guess you’re
right,” she stammered. “I mean, I don’t even
know when—or even if—you want to have kids,” he continued. “Maybe we
should’ve talked that over before I came up with this crazy idea.” Honey worried her
lower lip thoughtfully as she chose her phrasing. “Brian, why did you propose out of the blue like
that?” “I don’t know,” he
murmured. “It seemed like the right thing to do.” “What do you mean by
that?” Her question held no malice; her tone clearly conveyed the fact that
she was truly curious rather than argumentative. Brian shrugged his
shoulders. “We’ve been dating for eight years; getting married was the next
logical step. I thought if we were going to do it, we might as well make it
exciting.” That answer did
little to assuage Honey’s doubts. Instead, it increased them. “The way you
put it…” She shook her head to clear away the mental cobwebs and then began
again in a voice near a whisper. “I worry you aren’t marrying me for the
right reasons.” “Honey, that’s
crazy!” “It’s not crazy,” she
hissed. She took a deep breath and then continued in a more civil tone. “I’m
sorry, Brian, but it sounds like marrying me is the next item on your to-do
list, and until you can cross it off, you’re stuck in limbo.” “Is this some kind of
a joke?” he demanded. “Do I look like I’m joking?” “Well, no, but I
can’t think of a better explanation for why you’re acting so crazy all of a
sudden,” Brian sputtered. “Everything was fine a few minutes ago, and then
out of the blue, you’re questioning my intentions.” Honey shook her head
sadly. “I’ve been worried about our relationship for a while now. It’s been
stagnant for so long—” “That’s why we’re
getting married!” he bellowed. “Honey, I don’t know if you’ve got a bad case
of the premarital jitters, but you aren’t making sense. I thought you wanted to get married—” “I do want to get married,” she
interrupted tearfully. “It’s all I’ve ever wanted!” “That’s obvious! You’ve
certainly been dropping enough hints lately. I thought getting engaged would
make you happy.” Honey expelled an
unsteady breath. “But you should be
happy, too.” “I am happy!” Noticing the curious
glances they were receiving from other passengers, Brian lowered his voice. “Honey,
what do I need to say to convince you?” She bit back the
first response that popped in her head and opted for a more diplomatic one.
“Well, saying you love me would be a good place to start.” Brian slapped his
forehead with the palm of his hand. “Of course I love you! I wouldn’t have
proposed if I didn’t!” “I know you
wouldn’t,” she responded, directing a pained look to the ground. Sensing his
scrutinizing gaze, she looked up and forced a slight smile. “I don’t know
what came over me, Bri. Like you said, it must be pre-wedding jitters.” “Yeah, that must be
it,” he agreed flatly. However, the smile he returned didn’t quite reach his
eyes. Honey cleared her
throat. “Do you think they’ll let us board soon?” “Yeah, they should.
I’m guessing they’ll give the first call in about twenty minutes or so.” “I hope it’s a short
flight,” she commented. “I’m really tired.” Brian grinned at her.
“Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but with the layover in Atlanta, it’ll
take almost eight hours for us to get to Vegas.” “Fabulous,” she
muttered. “That means we’ll be sleeping on the plane.” “At least that’ll
make the trip seem shorter.” Honey snorted. “Well,
that’s some consolation, I guess.” “I need to stretch my
legs for a little bit,” Brian said as he uncoiled his six-foot-four frame
from the chair. “I’m going to get some coffee. Do you want anything?” “No, I’m fine,” Honey
murmured. “I’ll be back in a
few minutes.” Honey maintained her
poise until Brian disappeared in the crowd. Once he was out of sight, she buried
her head in her hands. She had never been so confused in all her life. After
years of praying for this very thing, her petition had finally been granted.
However, now that her wish had come true, doubts plagued her mind. Should she
marry Brian, or would that be a mistake for both of them? Her entire body
shuddered at the thought. It would be so easy
to give in. There was nothing she wanted more than to be Brian’s wife, and it
would be so simple to get on that plane. But the main question that niggled
at the back of her mind was why. Why
did she want to get married so badly? Why? The answer to that
little three-letter, one-syllable query held major implications, implications
that could possibly ruin Brian’s or her life. Although she tried to dismiss
the question from her brain, her conscience wouldn’t let it go away. Her head
repeated the word over and over until she was dizzy from the vicious cycle.
She was still considering the answer when Brian returned fifteen minutes
later. “I know you said you
didn’t want anything, but I got you a snack.” He offered her the paper sleeve
from Starbucks that contained a still warm chocolate chip cookie. If her stomach hadn’t
been churning like the ocean during a tsunami, she might’ve been excited
about the treat. “Thank you. I’ll eat it on the way to Vegas when I have
something to drink.” “I think of everything,”
Brian said. With a grin, he pulled a Diet Pepsi from the deep pocket of his
winter coat. “I knew you wouldn’t want coffee, and it’s too late for Red Bull.” “How well you know
me,” Honey murmured. She settled the bottle between her knees and unwrapped
the cookie. “Want to split it with me?” Brian shook his head.
“No thanks. I already had one. My stomach was growling.” The pair sat in
silence as Honey nibbled on her cookie and Brian sipped his coffee. The chill
from outside seemed to have seeped inside the airport, and a shiver traveled
up Honey’s spine. “I think it’s getting
colder outside,” she remarked. “I should’ve gotten
you cocoa instead of pop.” “No, this is good.” “Are you sure?” Brian
asked. “There’s still time for me to make a quick run back to Starbucks.
Their hot chocolate’s pretty good.” “I’m fine, really.” Honey’s throat closed
a little. Brian was so considerate. He’d make a wonderful husband. He was so
much like his father, and Honey knew that he’d treat his wife just as well as
Peter treated Helen. The Beldens were a loyal bunch. Honey couldn’t imagine
any of them ever deserting their family. To them, marriage meant forever, and
Brian would never leave her alone. He was so safe… “What’re you
thinking?” Brian’s voice
startled Honey from her ruminations. “About you,” she answered honestly. “Then I hope they’re
nice thoughts.” “They are.” She
looked up at him, a tender smile on her face. “I was just thinking about what
a wonderful husband you’ll make.” “I hope I prove you
right.” “You will.” Brian reached down
and clasped her hand. “And you’ll make a wonderful wife. It takes patience to
be married to a doctor, and after putting up with Trixie all these years,
you’ve certainly proven that you have a bunch of it.” They laughed, and
then settled back into silence. Although Honey wasn’t saying anything out
loud, her mind was racing with activity. One part of her brain shouted angry accusations,
while the other countered with heated refutations. Honey found herself stuck
in the middle and unsure of which side to take. She had to make a
decision. But first, she had to listen to what Brian was saying. “Wow, I can’t believe
we’re doing this.” “I know,” she
mumbled. Brian shot her the
kind of grin that curled a girl’s toes. “Guess nobody can call me ‘boring’
now.” “Brian, I don’t care
what anyone says, you’ve never been
boring,” Honey told him. Studying him closely,
she laid her hand along his jaw line. She loved him fiercely, but did she
love him for the right reasons? Or was she in love with the security that he
offered? Their future depended upon the answer. It was time to search the
hidden recesses of her heart and see what she could find. Once she was honest
with herself, it all became clear. Suddenly, all the pieces to the puzzle
fell into place, and the reassurance for which she had so desperately sought
settled onto her. This newfound peace wasn’t anything earth shattering. It
hadn’t come in the form of a vision or an out-of-body experience; it was
merely a still, small voice that honestly answered her questions. Now Honey
had to share this realization with the person who mattered the most to her. “After we land and
get something to eat, do you want to immediately check into a hotel or start
looking for a dress?” Brian asked. Honey took a deep breath, and then took a
leap of faith. “It might be best to check into a hotel as soon as we land so
we can drop off our stuff, and I don’t think we should get married, so I
guess maybe we shouldn’t check in first, although I really don’t want to
carry everything around.” It took a few seconds
for Brian to register that stream of Honey-speak. “C-could you repeat that?” Using every ounce of
courage that she possessed, she began again. “It might be best to check—” “No, the part in the
middle,” Brian interjected. “The part about us not getting married.” Honey felt the onset
of tears, but she did her best to keep her voice steady. “I don’t think we
should get married,” she whispered. She held her breath for what seemed like
an eternity as she waited for Brian to respond. “Is this because of
me?” Brian’s voice was husky with emotion. “Do you think I’m marrying you for
the wrong reasons?” “No, I think I would be marrying you for the wrong reasons.” “Honey, I—” She placed the tips
of her fingers lightly against his lips to silence him. “I’ve been doing a
lot of thinking, and I learned something about myself.” The tears that she had
so bravely kept at bay broke loose and began a slow descent down her cheeks.
“I’m terrified of being alone.” “But when we get
married, you won’t be alone.” “I know, and that’s
the point,” she cried. “I’m so sorry, Bri! So very, very sorry. But that’s
the wrong reason to marry someone.” Brian didn’t
immediately respond. Methodical and analytical as he was, he thought long and
hard before answering. He took several deep breaths in and out as he
processed her words. To Honey’s surprise, his shock had vanished and had been
replaced by something akin to guilt. When he finally did speak, Honey noticed
that his own eyes were misty and his voice wavering. “You don’t have
anything to be sorry for,” he said huskily. “I love you, but—” “Don’t, Brian,” she
pleaded, hoping he wouldn’t try and change her mind. “But I’m not in love with you,” he finished
quietly. “And I don’t think you’re in love with me, either.” Honey held her breath
for so long that she finally had to gulp for air. “Why do you think that?” “Because I spend so
much time with people who truly are in love. I know how Jim would react if
Trixie called off their wedding, and I didn’t react like that.” “How would Jim act?” After a long pause,
Brian murmured, “Like someone stabbed him in the stomach with a dozen butcher
knives. It would rip his guts out.” “You’re right, and I
know that Trixie would walk barefoot on broken glass to marry Jim,” Honey
whispered. “She’d never call it off in the first place.” “No, she wouldn’t.” The struggle of
holding back her emotions proved too much. Weary, she sank into the safe
haven of Brian’s embrace, and he didn’t reject her. In spite of the fact that
they’d just ended their engagement, being in each other’s arms was the most
natural place to be. Honey rested her head on his chest, while Brian wrapped
his arms around her and held on as if his own life depended on it. “Where did we go
wrong?” she choked out. “We didn’t do
anything wrong, sweetheart,” he told her softly. “We just aren’t meant to be
together.” “I do love you.” “And I love you.” “But I think you’re
right that I’m not in love with
you,” Honey admitted. “I’ve been trying to convince myself that I was, but
deep down, I always knew something was missing.” “Me too.” “Why couldn’t it work
out?” she sobbed. “Mart and Di are happy, and so are Trixie and Jim. What
makes us different?” Brian kissed the top
of her head. “I wish I knew.” “This isn’t how it
was supposed to end. Trixie was going to marry Jim, Di was going to marry
Mart, Hallie was going to marry Dan, and I was going to marry you!” “If it makes you feel
any better, I don’t see Dan settling down with that hippie cousin of mine any
time soon,” Brian remarked wryly. In spite of the
circumstances, Honey giggled. “I don’t either. Dan voted for a Republican in
the last mayoral election, so I don’t think Hallie would have anything to do
with him now.” “That, and he can’t
choke down her alfalfa sprouts,” Brian added. “Poor Dan, but at
least Trixie is happy,” Honey chuckled. Talking about their friends had
lightened the mood briefly, but it also served as a reminder to the reality
that faced them when they got home. “Oh, Brian,” she
sniffled, “what’re we going to tell everyone?” “The truth.” “How do you think
they’re going to react?” Brian smiled to
himself. It was so typical of Honey to put the feelings of others ahead of
her own. “Well, I guess that will depend upon how we react.” “What do you mean?”
she prompted. “If we start treating
one another differently, they’ll probably be uncomfortable,” he explained.
“But if they can see that we still genuinely care for one another even though
we aren’t together, it’ll help ease the transition.” “I suppose you’re
right.” “Besides,” Brian
continued, “we can’t live our lives to please everyone else. That’s what got
me where I am now. I wanted to be the perfect son and do exactly what was
expected of me, and that meant not rocking the boat.” Honey nodded
thoughtfully. She’d always suspected as much. “As wonderful as our friends
are, I’m sure they’ll support us.” “Yes, they will.” “I guess we’ll be
making the most adjustments,” she commented. “You’re probably
right,” he agreed. “As long as we’ve dated, it’ll feel really weird when one
of us brings a date to a Bob-White get-together.” Honey tilted her head
up to shoot him a suspicious look. “Do you have anyone in mind that you want
to ask out?” “No,” he answered,
his tone genuine. “How about you?” “I can honestly say
that there isn’t.” She smiled affectionately at him. “You’ll be a hard act to
follow, Dr. Belden. Whenever I do
meet someone, he’ll have mighty big shoes to fill.” “Literally!” Brian exclaimed.
He held up a size-thirteen foot, causing them both to laugh. Honey couldn’t help
but think that it was amazing how easily they were able to go from lovers to
friends. When Brian asked what she was thinking, she told him as much. “I guess that proves
we’re doing the right thing,” he observed. When she looked back
down, her gaze landed on the diamond adorning her left hand. “Oh, Brian,” she
murmured sadly, “I’ll have to give this back.” She shifted her position
remove the ring, but before she could take it off, Brian stopped her. “Don’t worry about
that now.” “But we aren’t
engaged.” “I know, but I don’t
want it.” “It’s a beautiful
ring,” she said. “Someday you might want to give it to someone else.” Brian shook his head.
“No, that ring was for you. It wouldn’t fit anyone else like it fits you.” “That’s sweet, but I
can’t keep it.” Eyes misting, Honey slipped off the ring and tucked it into
the pocket of his shirt. “Maybe you can return it and get your money back.” “Well, since you
don’t want it, I could use it to
pay off some of my medical school loans…” “I do want it, but I can’t accept it,”
she whispered. For the first time since their breakup, Honey felt a pang of
sadness in her heart. The realization of her actions finally began to set in,
and she was overcome with fear. Tears smarting at the backs of her eyes, she
said, “I just wish there was some way to know that we’re doing the right
thing—” Just then, an announcement
came over the intercom. “Due to inclement weather, all flights out of
LaGuardia Airport have been cancelled. We advise you to use caution should
you choose to vacate the airport, as the icy conditions are making travel
treacherous. We’re sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused.” Honey giggled
nervously. “I guess I got my sign.” “Can’t get much
clearer than that.” “That’s right,” she
agreed, sniffing back her tears. “So, I guess it’s settled. We aren’t getting
married.” “Considering what you
do to the wrong grooms, I’m glad we found this out now.” Brian winked at her.
“After all these years, I’m rather attached to my head. I’d hate for you to
cut it off.” Giggling, she swatted
him playfully on the arm. “And people think Mart’s a goof,” she teased. “On a
more serious note, what’s the plan? The roads are going to be a mess.” Brian nodded as he
looked around at all the people making a beeline for the exits. “Yeah, and
with all these impatient people leaving at the same time, there’s going to be
a ton of accidents.” “What do we do now?” “We stay here and
wait out the storm,” he answered. “Is that okay with you?” Honey nodded. She
wanted to delay going home as long as possible. She knew Trixie would ask a
million questions, and she didn’t feel like answering them just yet. “I’m not
in any hurry,” she murmured. “Well, I don’t know
about you, but I’m going to take a quick catnap. I’m exhausted after moving
furniture all day.” Brian settled into a more relaxed position, still keeping
his arm around her as he closed his eyes. Once she was sure
that he was asleep, Honey freed herself from the sanctuary of his embrace. She
walked over to the large windows that she knew overlooked the water. Because
it was night, all she could see in the distance was darkness. However, that
suited her purposes. She wasn’t searching for what she could see; she was searching for what she couldn’t, and the starless night provided the perfect blank canvas
for her thoughts. Since she was
thirteen, she’d had her future all mapped out. What she’d be, where she’d
live, who she’d marry… For the most part, she’d stuck to her plan, but now she’d
been given a fresh start. It was as if the ending to her script had been
erased, and the director had placed the pen in her hand and asked her to
finish it. The possibilities were endless! There was one thing
for certain that she planned to do as soon as she got home. If she was going
to make a fresh start, the wedding album would need to be emptied since she
wasn’t going to the chapel any time soon. She’d put all of those pictures in
the trash, freeing up many blank pages to fill. Breaking tradition
wouldn’t be easy for her; she’d always had a need to please others. However, after twenty-five years, it was
time to start pleasing herself. Succeed or fail, she would embrace all of the
opportunities that life had to offer her. That thought brought a satisfied
smile to her lips, and in spite of the darkness in the distance, her future
suddenly held a glimmer of hope that hadn’t been there before. It was up to Honey to
write the rest of her story, and she couldn’t wait to start filling up all
those blank pages.
Before anyone gets
angry with me, they should send all their complaints to Honey. This was all
her idea, and she forced me to obey. Hey, she’s learned a lot from Trixie
through the years. The girl knows how to get her way. ;-) Thank you to my
lovely editors, Kaye, Ryl, and Steph, who worked hard on this story. I
appreciate all your help and encouragement, ladies! “Going to the Chapel”
was performed by The Dixie Cups. Trinity Church was
featured on the index page of this story. Kleinfeld is a famous
bridal shop in Manhattan, and the shop is featured on the TLC show, “Say Yes
to the Dress”. Nathan’s is a famous
hot dog stand, and yes, they do have one in the Delta terminal of LaGuardia.
I checked. They also have a Starbucks. J “Rich Bride, Poor
Bride” is a show on WE. I’ve never watched it, but I’d probably like it. Pnina Tornai is a
famous designer for Kleinfeld’s, and her dresses are beyond beautiful. If
Damon and I ever reaffirm our vows, I’m getting a Pnina!!! (and she should
give me one for free since I’ve given her such a good plug J)
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